zen

Today, I decided to be adventurous by going outside to film my Youtube Easter Zen Garden video. I only went about 15 feet from the front door but it is a start. It felt nice outside today and I needed the sun. I’m about as tan as a piece of printer paper. I brought my camera and DIY out with me to the lawn chair. I’m doing a series of videos called Operation Hope & Heal on Youtube that I will link here. A few days ago it occurred to me that it could be a good idea to get channel creators together to make videos for those staying home due to social distancing. It’s easier said than done to rally for a cause in a way that will make noise. Thankfully, I did have a few channel creators get together and upload videos tonight. My next idea for a relaxing video for those at home is an Easter Zen Garden.

Few DIY’s are easier than making a Zen Garden. What I like about them is that you can do all different themes. Be it a beach theme or an Easter one. It is also extremely affordable to make a Zen Garden. You can find sand, rocks, fairy decorations, and other items to add to your garden at the Dollar Tree. I found my vintage bunny rabbits & swings at the thrift store. Thrift stores are great places to source items for crafts. I’m currently sourcing from my house though, considering that everything is closed from COVID-19.

I’m listening to NBC News on Youtube and I swear I almost burst a blood vessel from their mask discussion. The President is now stating that cloth masks are advised and pushing people to leave the medical masks to the professionals. While I agree with this concept, there are a lot of Americans that also need medical masks. Those with very low immune systems, like myself, need access. Also, cloth masks I believe give 3% protection (from what I’ve heard…who knows). Though that is better than nothing, it is not much. If the president is going to advise these types of masks, he needs to explain the actual protection that these masks give. I’ve considered ordering one but I do not think they are strong enough for me. Vent Over.

The Sacred Space that I made yesterday is clearly where I need to go…

My goal is to have my Easter Zen Garden video uploaded on Youtube this week. When it is uploaded, I will link it here. Jeremy and I like how it turned out. I have put it up on the coffee bar as my first Easter decoration. I’m also needing to film an Easter coffee bar decor video. I enjoy decorating the coffee bar, as I think it helps with moral. If I feel strong enough, that will get done tomorrow. My camera battery started to die on me when I was outside so I need to charge that up.

I’m going to try to make it a thing to go out and lie in the lawn chair more. I listened to the birds today, which I never do. It was interesting how different each bird sounded. I wondered if they understood each other. One sounded like me when I fuss at Jeremy. It was loud and screechy so I’m sure he would agree with my comparison. I also took time to notice and film the flowers to add to my Youtube video.

I don’t know why it is SO hard to go outside with Depression. The desire to stay in and move very little is extremely overwhelming. Everything I do feels forced and exhausting. This is why everyone that has mental illness must truly fight to survive. It’s hard. If you need validation, you have mine on that topic. The struggle is real. But I will say that when I got myself outside, it felt like a relief. It was relaxing and got me away from social media. I’m realizing more and more how destructive the media & popular apps are to our minds. While they can be a needed escape, they can also be a reason to stop functioning. It’s important that I continue moving, communicating, and expressing myself through art. Push for what is important to you. Even if it is a fight.